We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize
