Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
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