is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
