about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
