Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
