Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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