Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
OPIZZABONMYDICK
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
how drunk are you?
Several
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
