dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
