So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize