she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
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