Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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