Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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