I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
