love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
