yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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