I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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