I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
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Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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