You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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