I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize
