new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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