hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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