dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
