that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
That reminds me...we need to get swords
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Even my vagina gasped.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
