Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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