I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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