He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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