i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Randomize