Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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