doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
