If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Success! We fucked roommates!
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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