So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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