LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
