I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Randomize
