Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
