There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Randomize