but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
