Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
