your thong is hanging out like whoa
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
