16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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