someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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