After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
