There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
