oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I just forgot I was standing up.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
