he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
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His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
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He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
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