You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Randomize
