hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm too high and old for this...
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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