someone threw a dead crab at me
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
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So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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