His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Randomize
