did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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