I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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