at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize
