dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.